Setting Goals for the Soul
With January comes a new year. With a new year comes a slew of new goals for me. Every year I will sit down and write things like: grow my business by 20%, pay off my student loan, Visit one new place this year. These are good, but they don’t get me very excited. They become these words that hang over my head for the next 6 – 12 months and then I usually feel like I didn’t shoot high enough or I disappointed myself by not fully achieving this goal I wrote on paper months earlier.
I searched out a new method this year. I wasn’t sure what I was looking for, but when I found it I knew. I found a video on Lifehacker.com that talked about creating goals around the way I want to feel. I watched the video and thought about this concept for a few weeks. I couldn’t stop thinking this video. Creating goals around the way I want to feel, brilliant!
So how does this work? Well, the idea comes from Danielle Laporte. You can find more info about her and her book, The Desire Map, at daniellelaporte.com She started it all by writing an emotion on a post it note, sticking it in her day timer and keeping it there for years to remind her as she moved through her day, week and year… years… how she wanted to feel. She would arrange her goals and to do’s around that feeling.
When she started to arrange her day around the way she wanted to feel she discovered she was happier, calmer, more successful and fulfilled. She calls these emotions: Core Desired Feelings.
There were three areas she suggested you focus on your core desired feelings:
3. Relationship & Society
To get started write down every feeling word you associate with these three areas. Danielle suggests staying away from BIG words with stigmas around them like, success or confidence. Narrow those words down, look up their meanings in the dictionary and find words that give you a little buzz when you look at them. Don’t allow outside influences to form your reality – meaning, don’t let the Jones’ determine your goals, set your goals based on what sets your fire.
Now narrow that list down to 3-7 feelings – these are your Core Desired Feelings. Once you have those feelings written down and you are buzzing from the excitement of making those feelings a reality or strengthening their presence in your life, ask yourself, “What can I do to make sure I feel those core desired feelings every day?” and “What do I need to do, have or experience to create my core desired feelings?” From those questions, with a focus on your core desired feelings, you will create goals that are meaningful with emotion associated with them.
Don’t clutter your goals, give them room to breath and grown. Set 1 – 3 goals for the year. Set big goals that get you excited. Don’t be afraid of failure, Danielle reminds us, we learn through contrast and some of our greatest accomplishments rise from the ashes of failure.
I went through this exercise and my four Core Desired Feelings are: Sturdy (powerful), Love, Grace (balance), Resilience. With those Core Desired Feelings I have created meaningful goals for 2014 and I know this will be my best year yet.
I encourage you to think about goal setting in a new way. Remove the mental clutter that blocks you from creating meaningful change in your life and go do big things!
Happy 2014 and Happy Organizing!